Dad jokes

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amckiwi
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by amckiwi » Thu Jul 19, 2018 2:26 am

A man with a shovel Doug
A man without a shovel Dougless
A man with no arms or legs in a pool Bob

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Steelman
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by Steelman » Thu Jul 19, 2018 10:15 am

What do you call a sleepwalking nun?

A roamin' catholic

what do you call a frog with a broken leg?

un-hoppy

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matt.wu
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by matt.wu » Thu Jul 19, 2018 12:33 pm

Rackness wrote:
Wed Jul 18, 2018 1:27 am
What is the best part of living in Switzerland?



I don’t know but the flag sure is a big plus.Image
This one made me chuckle. :lol:
:htfu:

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nweash
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by nweash » Thu Jul 19, 2018 11:15 pm

amckiwi wrote:What do you call a homosexual dinasour?
Megasorarse (megasorass)

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?


Lickalottapus
Image

R@cerx
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by R@cerx » Sat Jul 21, 2018 5:53 pm

amckiwi wrote:
Thu Jul 19, 2018 2:26 am
A man with no arms or legs in a pool Bob
Same man in a pile of leaves... Russell

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Rackness
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by Rackness » Sat Jul 21, 2018 7:30 pm

R@cerx wrote:
amckiwi wrote:
Thu Jul 19, 2018 2:26 am
A man with no arms or legs in a pool Bob
Same man in a pile of leaves... Russell
The same guy on the porch Mat.

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Sidheguitarist
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by Sidheguitarist » Sat Jul 21, 2018 11:26 pm

amckiwi wrote:
Tue Jul 17, 2018 4:14 am
What do you call a homosexual dinasour?
Megasorarse (megasorass)
The lesbian one: Lixalottapus
darkness season

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Heuerville
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by Heuerville » Sun Jul 22, 2018 7:37 am

Builder walking with his wheelbarrow, and it's going '....squeak.......... squeak........... squeak...'

Foreman: Is that your wheelbarrow?
Builder: Yes

Foreman: You're fired
Builder: WHAT, for having a squeaky wheel??

Foreman: No. It should be going 'squeak-squeak-squeak-squeak-squeak'
Stewart - Heuerville & Heuerville Straps
http://heuerville.wordpress.com/heuerville-straps/
"SOB get me a drink"

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Ruggs
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by Ruggs » Sun Jul 22, 2018 12:42 pm

What’s a pirate’s favorite letter?

(Everyone says R)

No matey, his true love be the C.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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matt.wu
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by matt.wu » Sun Jul 22, 2018 3:47 pm

Ruggs wrote:What’s a pirate’s favorite letter?

(Everyone says R)

No matey, his true love be the C.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
:lol:
:htfu:

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amckiwi
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by amckiwi » Thu Jul 26, 2018 4:12 pm

Why did the cow return to the marijuana field?
It was the pot calling the cattle back!

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Rackness
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by Rackness » Fri Aug 03, 2018 3:23 pm

Do you know why Cows have hooves and not feet?





because they lactose!

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Rackness
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Dad jokes

Post by Rackness » Fri Aug 03, 2018 3:23 pm

What do you call cheese that isn't yours?



Nacho Cheese

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amckiwi
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by amckiwi » Fri Aug 03, 2018 8:47 pm

:cheers: This one takes the cake
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amckiwi
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by amckiwi » Fri Aug 03, 2018 8:49 pm

I have chirpies
It is a canarial disease
And is untweatable

That is a hard type with spell checker on!

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amckiwi
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by amckiwi » Sat Aug 04, 2018 12:47 am

D841DC97-2D93-4C98-B097-4638F849B1A4.jpeg
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amckiwi
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by amckiwi » Mon Aug 06, 2018 1:50 am

What do you call a roman with a pubic hair stuck in his teeth?
Gladiator

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amckiwi
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by amckiwi » Mon Aug 06, 2018 2:32 am

A65EFE71-BDCC-4229-A372-CA52103213F0.jpeg
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amckiwi
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by amckiwi » Mon Aug 06, 2018 2:33 am

Two Chinese dudes break into a distillery. One turns to the other and says “Is this Whiskey? The other one says “Yes but not as Whiskey as wobbing a bank!!!

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Sidheguitarist
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by Sidheguitarist » Wed Aug 08, 2018 8:51 am

Why does the Norwegian Navy have bar codes on the sides of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can.........


Scandanavian
darkness season

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Rackness
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by Rackness » Wed Aug 08, 2018 5:48 pm

Sidheguitarist wrote:Why does the Norwegian Navy have bar codes on the sides of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can.........


Scandanavian
Image

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amckiwi
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by amckiwi » Thu Aug 09, 2018 1:57 am

Someone threw a bottle of Omega 3 at me.
Luckily, my injuries were only super fish oil.

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Rackness
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by Rackness » Sat Aug 11, 2018 6:31 am

A flat earther decided to walk to the end of the earth to prove it is flat.





He came around

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amckiwi
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by amckiwi » Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:19 pm

Thanks for explaining the word "many" to me.


It means a lot.

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Heuerville
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Re: Dad jokes

Post by Heuerville » Mon Aug 13, 2018 6:36 pm

Flat-Earthers website states that they have many members around the globe.
Stewart - Heuerville & Heuerville Straps
http://heuerville.wordpress.com/heuerville-straps/
"SOB get me a drink"

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